I rather being mean to people than myself.

I rather being mean to people than myself. That sounds rude or self-centered, but I love myself that much.

Of course, I don’t want to be labelled as a mean person. But. If I got one, perceived as one, for saving my own sanity and happiness, I don’t mind. I’m responsible for my own well being.

Toxic relationship

Giving up on people is an emotional maturity.

Not everybody can get you.

No, somebody just won’t change. Pattern doesn’t lie.

It’ not because you’re shitty. It’s not all your fault. Universe doesn’t revolve around you. Sometimes it’s their fault. And responsible respond to it is walk away.

You are not a bad person. A responsible adult.

If you are trying to break free from a relationship that feels more like an addiction than a loving bond, one strategy is to reframe your thoughts and emotions about that person as if he or she is a cold, clinical biological process, in order to gain a healthy distance. For example, after a week of not calling, you feel a wave of longing in your chest and think, “But I really do love him (or her)…I should call right now…” Instead, you could simply notice that sensation and tell yourself, “Interesting. There goes my caudate nucleus releasing dopamine and producing a sensation of longing. OK, back to work.”

One way to give yourself both comfort and encouragement without deluding or berating yourself is to be more self-compassionate. Self-compassion involves reassuring yourself that you’re not a horrible person, that it’s understandable to be attached to someone against your better judgment, and that a lot of other people go through this kind of thing, too. Self-compassion also involves caring for and wanting to do what’s best for yourself, as a parent would a child — which means not staying in a relationship that’s hurting you. For more on increasing self-compassion, see Dr. Kristin Neff’s Psychology Today blog.

You can’t judge what people like or don’t like. What they consume to ease and makes them happy, their interest and hobby, or their chosen way of living. If you don’t like it, hate the behaviour, not the person. It’s hard, I know. I have a lot of ego bottling up.